A Birthday Abroad

As I drifted to sleep on Saturday, April 6, my efforts were interrupted by intense stomach pain. “Crap,” I sighed and curled into the fetal position. That’s what I get for drinking a champagne bottle’s worth of mimosas and watching The Good Wife for 12 hours.

I was sure that the stomach pains were a logical consequence of my day-of-me, and dragged myself to school on Sunday, blaming a bad tuna sandwich and, let’s face it, way too much champagne. Monday, I still scolded myself but admitted that God’s punishment had gone a little too far. By Tuesday, I could barely stand-up (or keep food and water down), so I called in sick and wallowed in bed for three days.

Fever dreams are the worst. In normal dreams, you are most often yourself, with some oddities, but regular strengths and weaknesses. Bad things happen, but you fight back. In fever dreams, you are just there, as weak and sick as you feel in real life, and terrible events transpire around you. Terribly weird events, that you can’t control, react to, or run from. Vacations with parents get cancelled when your Dad falls off of a boat into the icy (icy?) Strait of Gibraltar and gets dragged to his death by a giant spider crab (seriously?) and all you can do is sit by the railing and exclaim, weakly, “I think I see a dolphin.” Weird. Shit.

So, I awoke on Thursday, determined to get out of my funk and celebrate my goddamn birthday. I emailed everyone letting them know the party was still on, albeit limited by my lack of ability to eat or drink, and wandered around the apartment for an hour before remembering that I needed to get dressed.

I love birthdays, because it’s a time of year when I get to step back and watch people I love enjoy themselves, and I get to feel kind of responsible for that. We had teppanyaki and sushi for dinner before heading to my place to play Wii and partake in some adultish beverages. I was able to eat, play Wii some, and drink water, so I considered the evening a success.

No birthday will ever top 1990 (memorialized in the above video), when my 2-year-old brother could not stop singing Happy Birthday to me and I celebrated at three parties with friends, parents, an adorable little brother, a great grandparent, and all of my grandparents (including those no longer with us). But every year I am humbled and amazed that people, these people, family and friends, not only put up with me for 365 days, but actually commemorate my existence on one of them.

And I feel lucky, and blessed, and all those other gooey feelings people get on birthdays.

Teppanyaki at "Fusion," the local Asian restaurant.

Justine & Beth playing Mario Kart, or, as Justine calls it, "Race-Car."

My banana cake (courtesy of Eric & Zainab). With the ice-cream cake, banana and candle all served separately.

Just Dance! 

Second favorite picture of the night. Joe, Adam, Justine & Beth.

FAVORITE picture of the night. Adam felt he didn't have enough room for his sweet dance moves.

The Marriage of Religion and Government

Free expression of religion is everywhere in Egypt. Women are veiled, differently according to their personal preferences and beliefs. The Call to Prayer echoes from multiple minarets, five times daily. People stop on sidewalks, in restaurants and even on airplanes to pray facing Mecca. The Egyptian people are free to celebrate and practice their religion openly, as long as they are Muslim.

Living in a religiously dominated country has altered my views on religion significantly. Whereas before I accepted the historic precedent that religion would affect political process, now I am almost adamant that it is unnecessary. I used to belong to a liberal church with a duty to combat the conservative Christian influence on American government, and now I lean toward churches and religious groups steering clear of policy completely. Part of me, perhaps, is starting to think they have little reason to exist at all outside of personal growth and moralistic reasoning.

When governments become obsessed with doing God’s will, other things fall from priority. In Egypt, tourism, the economy, and jobs seem less important than the discussion of whether or not women should be forced to wear veils in a certain way/at all. In America, keeping two loving people from getting married is higher on the to-do list than ending poverty.

But the argument stands that government’s job is to do the will of the people and if the will of the people is religiously biased, then so be it. I argue that it’s not always government’s job to promote the will of the people. Sometimes, the majority is oppressive and wrong. Sometimes, the people may be temporarily blinded by religion and it’s up to the smarter, wiser folks in power to research and investigate and steer the country in the correct direction. Slavery, discrimination, oppression, all worldwide issues that at one time may have had majority support in many countries. Just because the crowd, the majority at the time, dictates that it’s okay to burn a Coptic Cathedral, doesn’t mean the government should put up with it.

I know there are many ways to argue with this. I am arguing with myself right now. Do not our standards of right and wrong come from a religious place most of the time? Weren’t abolitionists and those who fought to preserve slavery doing so on religious arguments? I just wonder what would happen if religion were taken out of the equation completely. Would society crumble or would we see the beginning of a new era, one in which politics and religion could be kept separately while still respecting individual religious beliefs? I honestly don’t know what the answer is, but I do know I am tired of having my personal life, both here in Egypt and in America, dictated by someone else’s doctrine.

Catching Up

I’ve been so busy.

In Alexandria on the Mediterranean Sea.

Don’t you love it when people say that? Like you are the only person with things to do.

I don’t have time.

Another winner. How about those two hours you spent watching Harlem Shake videos, huh? You seemed to have time for that.

I can’t think of anything interesting to write.

Now, that’s just crap. You live in Egypt.

I’m writing now, okay, so let’s just put the past behind us. Yes, it has been more than three months since my last entry, but in these three eventful months I have experienced enough expat ups and downs to provide entries until summer. So sit back, relax, and enjoy my drama…ahem…experience.

December 21-30, 2012: Israel & Palestine

We spent nine days driving through Israel and Palestine, including Bethlehem, Nazareth and Jericho. I swam in the healing Dead Sea and sailed on the Sea of Galilee. I walked where Jesus walked, which led me to the conclusion that Jesus was in incredible shape. This experience both questioned and strengthened my faith, a process that would continue for months. It wasn’t a bad place to be when my dog died near the end of the trip. Israel is a beautiful country and I would go back in a heartbeat.

River Jordan.

Jericho, with my friend and the school's art teacher, Krista.

Mount of Olives.

Payphone + fanny pack = 1980s. 

Bethlehem on Christmas Eve. Where Christ was born.

"On a boat" on the Sea of Galilee. 

Sunset over the Dead Sea.

Masada.

December 30, 2012-January 7, 2013: Turkey

After Israel, my friends, Justine & Chris, and I headed to Turkey. We spent a relaxing four days in Istanbul and Cappadocia respectively. I climbed through cave dwellings and toured the Bosphorus Strait by boat. On our last day, it snowed, which made it all the more difficult to return to Cairo.

Justine, Chris and me in front of a cave monastery.

Justine & me at the Grand Bazaar in Istanbul.

January 8-February 1, 2013: Back in Cairo

I started running, working my way up to 4K, four times per week. I felt healthy and fit, while still eating pretty much whatever I wanted. I celebrated my friend, Angela’s, engagement and became more discouraged at work. I couldn’t wait for my brother’s visit.

Eric and I reenacting Angela's engagement.

February 2-March 1, 2013: Tavy in Egypt

Having my little brother, Tavis, in Egypt for a month was a huge blessing. He helped me with concerts, housework and was a supportive companion during a rough time. We visited historical sites that I hadn’t had a chance to see: the Pyramids of Giza, a different part of Saqqara, Coptic Cairo and the Citadel. On our first horseback trip, I was kicked by a horse, bruising up my leg and halting my running for a while. I fell out of favor with a good friend and Tav was right there to help me get through it. He took care of me when I was home with pink-eye for two days. We shared a room and he was never a bother. I miss him.

With the student divers in Hurghada, and my brother!

Horseback at the Pyramids.

Climbing a Pyramid.

Temple of the Sphinx.

In the Citadel.

At Abu Sid, a favorite Egyptian restaurant in Maadi.

On a Felucca on the Nile.

March 2-March 28: Living with an Injury

One day after Tav left, as Angela and I walked the streets of a hip neighborhood called Zamalek, I tripped while walking off a curb and rolled my ankle. I tried to recover quickly, but the pain intensified and I ended up in a shady Cairo emergency room where the doctor was at first convinced it was a fracture. The X-rays proved different, and he put a plaster slab on it as a bad sprain. I’d sprained my ankle before and never felt this kind of pain. I was confined to crutches for two days until I could see a specialist nearer to my home. Angela took care of me and we both had to miss Beth’s birthday because of it. I felt very lucky to have Angela there at that time. I struggled through work and finally saw a specialist, who helped me get an air cast delivered to my apartment. This allowed me to limp, very slowly, and I no longer needed the crutches. I was in extraordinary amounts of pain and I started to appreciate American doctors’ affinity for prescribing narcotic painkillers, while also regretting I was in Egypt. My preschoolers and first graders performed concerts, I took one day off, and wallowed through March unable to exercise, dive or walk at a normal speed. Once the specialist was able to view the ankle and the X-rays, he diagnosed a major sprain with a ruptured ligament. He kept saying, “You’re going to wish you would have just broken it.” It was (and still is) hugely frustrating. But, I did get in a trip to Alexandria to celebrate Angela’s birthday. We relaxed, saw the amazing library and hung-out on the Mediterranean.

This is actually not the grossest picture.

1st Grade concert. So far, the concert of which I am most proud. 

Pre-K concert. Adorable 3 and 4-year-olds.

At the Bibliotecha Alexandria.

March 29-April 5: London & Amsterdam

My ankle has improved and with the cast, I can walk normally, albeit a bit slowly. I spent Spring Break in London & Amsterdam, first visiting my friends, Sarah & Dave in London. Then, Sarah and I traveled onto Amsterdam for a little vacation. I saw two great shows and enjoyed being in Western cities. Small modern conveniences turn into huge luxuries after living in Egypt for a while.

Big Ben, my first stop after arriving in London.

Platform 9 3/4 because I'm a Harry Potter nerd. 

After visiting the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam. My childhood music friend, Sarah Beth.

The Peace Palace in The Hague, Amsterdam.

Hanging out with a WWII soldier at the Churchill War Rooms.

About to attend an Evensong service at Westminster Abbey.

Mama & Daddy bought me a great ticket to see "Matilda" in the West End for my birthday.

A surprise birthday celebration on my last night in London.

Now, I’m just trying to get through the last term here without completely falling apart. I co-music direct the all-school musical, specifically coaching the principle roles in their solos. I’m enjoying this immensely and missing my own performing a bit. I’m only wearing the air-cast to and from work, switching to an ankle brace during the school day. The first day was rough, but today is going much better. Living and working abroad is difficult, and it’s hard to tell sometimes if it’s just living abroad or more specific to my job and location. I do know that at some point, I have to become a stronger person because of this. I’m just waiting for that to happen.

I plan to write more often. I need to write more often. And not sugarcoated adventures or prolonged emotional rants, but a balance between awe and honesty. That way it will be therapeutic for me and still fun for you. As my views on religion, privilege and ethics shift, I hope to do a better job of exploring those inner dialogs here. Because, if not on the internet, then where?

Egypt to Israel: Day 1- Jerusalem

I apologize for spelling and grammar errors...iPad typing and an unhelpful browser are only getting the ideas online. For pictures, please visit: Egypt to Israel Day 1- Jerusalem

Last night at 6:00 p.m., 18 people boarded a bus in Ma'adi, hoping to be in Israel in less than 7 hours. Unfortunately, it would be more than 13 long hours in a bus before they saw the country's border.

Military and police rules change regularly in a part of the world where rules are often ignored and countries are often at war. Art, our tour leader and a coworker, anticipated this issue which is why we left Egypt early that evening. By the time we reached the Sinai peninsula, our security guard on the bus was told we were not allowed to cross via normal route. Instead of using the "middle road" to cut across the desert into Israel, we were forced to follow the peninsula's perimeter, adding several hours to our already long trip. This winding road was riddled with police and military checkpoints. At one time, we waited over an hour because we could not proceed without a police escort. Finally, 12 hours later, we pulled into Taba, the Israel/Egypt border. We walked our bags through both country's security and customs and finally arrived in the beautiful country of Israel.

Our guide, Suzanne, gave us each 20 shekels so we could get coffee and pastries at Yellow, a local quick stop. We then headed to the River Jordan, a little spot where some famous dude was baptized a long time ago. We also passed Lot's wife on the way, which I feel is a great rendering of what might happen to you if you don't follow directions the first time.

The River Jordan is neither wide nor deep at Jesus's baptism spot, and you could easily wade across into the country of Jordan. It was strongly discouraged, though, by our guides and by the soldiers with machine guns on each side. Several tour busses from South Africa were there baptizing people into the church. The main pastor gave a short sermon and there was spontaneous song and dance. It was so joyful and perfect, that even in the rain and cold, pilgrims come to be welcomed into the Christian family.

Our bus proceeded to Jericho, which is in Palestinian territory. We ate lunch at an oversized gift shop with an amazing view of the city ruins next door. I decided I would sing a fitting song for each stop in our journey, which is funny now, but your just wait. "Joshua Fit the Battle of Jericho" sounded nice from the rooftop into the city's former glory.

As the bus ascended to Jerusalem, Psalms were read on the bus. The Psalms of ascension, 120-134, were chosen by various travelers and spoken or sung over the microphone. I even got to sing Psalm 121, music composed by my college friends Rachael and Andy.

Jerusalem is one of the most beautiful cities I have ever seen. It feels like a Middle Eastern Europe, with narrow stone streets and ruins and walls protecting the quarters. Our hotel is in the middle of the Old City Jerusalem and we can easily walk to all the quarters (neighborhoods). After settling in, we headed through the Armenian and Jewish quarters to the Western Wall (The Wailing Wall) to experience Shabbat.

As we came upon an overlook we could see the wall and the maze-like protecting walls leading to Palestine. We could hear the mosque's call to prayer and see the dome from the other side and at the same time, heard singing and saw joyous celebrating at the wall on the Israeli side. It was a beautiful, sad melding of harmonies as prayers were sung and boundaries ignited in song.

We went down to the wall to experience the crowd firsthand. There were separate parts of the wall for males and females to pray, sing or gather. I wrote prayers down one piece of paper and placed them folded up into the wall as people have done for so many years. Krista and I shared a prayer before maneuvering our way home I the cold rain with Chris and Justine. After a delicious dinner and a hot shower, we are ready for bed.

I will make many references to faith here, and many jokes and just as many frustrations. Some who knew me a while back may not be surprised that I'm enjoying such intensely religious experience. Others may be turned off by my jaded disbelief of most religious practice. But what I'm finding more and more, after living in a Muslim country and visiting this wonderful place, is that what is beautiful about religion and faith is not whether or not it is true. It does not particularly matter if I believe it fully, just that others do and that this is meaningful to them and me in some way. I cannot wait to discern this experiences for the next 9 days.

Video Blog- Dive Safari, Thanksgiving 2012

"...I Didn't Do Camping"

I didn't do camping. “In my previous life…” I begin my sentences. “…I hated the sun,” “…I never exercised,” “…I kept my apartment cold and dark,” “…I disliked the outdoors,” and “…I didn't do camping.” One time my father suggested a family camping trip. My mother and I shared a sarcastic glance and she replied, “Sure! Where’s the nearest Hilton?”

When I was 13, I saw the ocean for the first time. And given that I had waited thirteen years for that moment, The Great Barrier Reef provided quite the pay-off. As camping experiences go, the Sahara Desert felt like a similar reward. In a way, it was like reliving my first ocean sighting. The same overwhelming vastness, the same humbling sense of smallness, the same fascinating calmness, where, for a moment, it could have been any point in history that I was standing in that spot, looking at that beauty. A desert today, an ocean millions of years ago.

On our second night, I laid on the sand, alone, under the stars. I have never seen so many stars, and I could not decide if they proved or denied the existence of God. Was I experiencing a justified religious connection or intense scientific evidence? Or was it some combination of the two? But the mesmerizing confusion of it all was comforting, because I felt sure of one thing: I am a different person now than I was four months ago. I am healthier, more daring, and deeply invested in new experiences. I dive in the Red Sea and sand-board along the dunes of the Sahara. And it doesn’t bother me that I haven’t had a shower in two days.

As my patience is tested, my feminism is diminished, my teaching is weathered, and my faith is confused, I have been strengthened in a type of faith that has been so difficult for me in the past—a faith that I can and will be a better, healthier person tomorrow than I was yesterday.

And I laid in the desert, considering my blessings…wondering what new, amazing first-time awaits me next.

This is how we slept each night. Bedouin-style camping with our amazing bedouin guides.

The white desert almost looks like snow drifts.

Climbing a cliff in the black desert.

Softest sand we ever felt!

Our transportation!

The "new" me. :-)

Rabbit rock formation. Kill the bunny!

This is Egypt.

For more desert pictures, Click Here.

Thanks to Ahmed, our amazing guide. http://www.safari-oasis.com/

A Poem for Scuba: Eight Dives of Eid

Diving Sonnet II

Marsa Alam, Egypt: The Red Sea

Eight Dives of Eid: October 24-29

The eight dives of Eid are a glorious thing,

Where the turtles swim and the dolphins sing,

Away from the hustle of work, take wing,

For the divers, yearning and wonder we bring.

The eight dives of Eid are a beautiful sight,

Where clams and coral fill with delight,

Away from the constant teaching plight,

For the divers, five days when things are just right.

The eight dives of Eid are a necessary break,

Where sharks do fear and excitement make,

Away from the grueling time spent awake,

For the divers, a journey we were able to take.

The eight dives of Eid a family made,

Where a dive squad created, explored and played,

Away from Cairo we wish we had stayed,

For the divers, the memories do not fade.

Pretty, pretty

We saw several blue-spotted rays.

These two lion fish are gorgeous.

Possibly my favorite shot from the entire trip!

I heart sea turtles!

I think this is a crocodile fish and it is weird-lookin'.

1/2 of the White Trip Dive Squad!

Also might be my favorite shot from the trip. We went into an underwater cavern and the light came down from holes in the ceiling.

Bottom right=SHARK! White Tip Reef Shark we saw. It was amazing.

A family of dolphins we saw while snorkeling in between dives. I like that it looks like they are flying.

For more pictures from our trip, Click Here.